Are you wanting to get a divorce but want it to be less messy, and more cordial? If you’re thinking of getting an amicable divorce, you’re not alone. Did you know that in the U.S. there are 787,038 divorces?
In this article, learn the top tips for ensuring your divorce is amicable, and avoid the stress. Read on to discover these tips for a more peaceful divorce, and give yourself peace of mind.
1. Is Divorce the Best Option?
Before moving forward with a divorce, make sure that all other options are exhausted, and it’s the only option left. You want to make sure it’s the best decision for both of you before you move forward since it’s permanent.
2. Stay Level-Headed
When you face signs you need a divorce head-on, it can be stressful for all involved, even the person who says they want it. Try to put your emotions at bay, especially if they won’t be supportive of getting to an amicable place.
3. Decide on Peace
Whether it’s for your kids or your own mental health, you’ll need to decide that you want an amicable divorce. Before obtaining a divorce lawyer, decide why it’s important for you to maintain the peace.
Is it because you’ll be co-parenting? Do you want to avoid extra stress for your children?
4. Obtain Therapy
Even friendly divorces are stressful since that person has been in your life for years. It’s only normal to get therapy. Consider a therapist or divorce counselor who works with those who are getting a divorce.
5. Choose Collaboration
No matter who announces the decision for divorce, it’s important you both work together, especially for your child’s sake. While you don’t have to see eye to eye on everything, it’s important to listen to each other and respect where the other is coming from.
If you’re having trouble communicating with each other consider a mediator. Mediation can make sure that you have those tough conversations away from your children. A mediator is a way for a third person to have unbiased suggestions for you both.
6. Remember That Every Marriage Is Different
While you know that your friends will have your best interests at heart, remember that each marriage and divorce will be different. Instead of leaning on them for divorce advice, it’s better to have a shoulder of support when you’re upset/stressed out during these times.
Remember that just because one situation works for your friend, doesn’t mean it’ll work for your situation. You want to consider the long-term, and not what’s going on right now.
7. Don’t Think It’ll Be Easy
Obtaining an amicable divorce will be hard since emotions and pain are involved. No matter who decides on the divorce, it’s still an emotional and heartbreaking decision.
Choosing an amicable divorce just means you’re trying to take as much of the stress out as possible for you both, and your children. It’s a mistake to think that the entire process will be easy and stress-free.
8. Realistic Expectations
When you’re deciding on what you want out of the divorce, be realistic. If you set your expectations so high and expect to receive everything, you might be disappointed. In order to keep a divorce amicable, you’ll want to make sure that you have realistic expectations.
Signs It’s Time for a Divorce
If you’re considering a divorce but aren’t sure it’s right for you, you’ll want to take an honest look at your marriage. Do you notice that there’s constant tension? While you might think you’re helping your children by staying together, are you helping them if you’re fighting all of the time?
Do you notice that there isn’t mutual respect anymore? If you have little to no respect for each other, one of you will feel rejected and ignored.
Waiting for Change
Are you wishing your partner will change and they promise they will, but you notice the same pattern over and over? If you’re waiting for them to change, but are seeing no effort on their part, is it something you can accept? Remember that you shouldn’t have to accept uncomfortable behavior.
Do you notice that you and your spouse are on different pages when it comes to your values? Maybe your spouse wants 5 kids and you want none? Or, maybe you can’t agree on what religion to raise your children?
If you can’t meet common ground with your values, it’s a sign that a divorce is on its way. You can be in 2 different points in your life, maybe your spouse is ready for kids tomorrow, and you want to focus on your career.
Counseling Doesn’t Work
Have you both tried marriage counseling, and you’re still experiencing the same fights and problems? It’s important to remember that counseling doesn’t work for everyone. Sometimes a marriage just won’t work due to differing values, or a lack of communication or respect.
Or, maybe after counseling only one of you is trying and the other isn’t. Remember that you both need to put in the work after a counseling session, or else it can be for nothing.
If you or your spouse are unfaithful, that’s a clear sign it’s time for a divorce. While some can recover from this pain, it’s difficult to overcome and trust again.
How To Have an Amicable Divorce
Now that you’ve explored the top tips for achieving an amicable divorce, you should be well on your way to having a less stressful situation. Just because you’re getting a divorce, doesn’t mean you can’t still enjoy luxury living. For more on everything from luxury travel to luxury living, check out our other articles today.