Meeting somebody when you are young is easy and predictable, but as you grow older it gets challenging to find the right man or woman for you. As soon as you hit your 40s, it’s easy to think that your dating prime is long gone and that you should give up, but as they say; age is just a number- there isn’t any right age to find the right partner.
Practically speaking, it’s not less a desire to find the right person but the idea of dating that hinders in many people’s case. For older people, the idea of dating, meeting them in regular settings and being open to sharing yourself with new, unknown people is what gives goosebumps. In addition to regular dating, there are many other ways you can meet people such as through dating websites. In fact, many young people turn to dating websites to find their perfect match, so it’s nothing to be ashamed of.
No matter what may be your path to find a partner, there are some underlying mistakes that all people do. These mistakes are reasons for older people to not easily find the right partner for them, resulting in frustration and loneliness.
Have a look at what you should avoid doing and what you should think of to find your right mate:
1. Set practical standards
As you grow older, you have more experience and exposure to the world around you. You know more than other youngsters and you have possibly achieved a lot especially in terms of money and career. In comparison to your younger self, as you grow older, you seek more from your partner than just happy times. You have standards set for yourself and you unintentionally judge the people you meet according to your standards. While it’s good to be clear on priorities, be flexible to give time and space to others so that they show you their actual self. Do not be too ambitious but make realistic and practical principles that are easy to follow and not hard for your ownself.
2. Don’t rush
It’s understandable that the older you get, the more interested you are going to be in a serious relationship, especially if you’ve had one in the past. Having said that, you shouldn’t be trying to dive straight back into one. Coming across overly strong when you begin talking to somebody can be a huge turn-off and this can scare somebody away who may just have given you what you want.
If you are not long out of a serious relationship, then it is worth considering having some downtime away from the dating scene before you go rushing back. The emotional trauma you’ve gone through can lead to you acting in a way which puts men and women off, and you may not even realize it.
3. Being too Old Fashioned
Times have changed and so have trends and preferences. Men no longer like to chase women if they don’t show interest nor women can be expected to remain restricted to household chores or specific domains. The modern attitude to dating is that both parties put in the same amount of effort and show the same level of interest to make things proceed. If you approach dating, both through dating sites and offline, with an old-fashioned mindset then you are virtually guaranteed to struggle to find a suitor or struggle to have dates go past the first few hurdles.
4. Making Elaborate Plans
Sure, dating is exciting, but you shouldn’t be going overboard, especially when it’s only your first and second date. Less is more! When you are making plans for your first date, try to do something simple such as dinner or drinks. Although this isn’t the most exciting way to go, it gives you an opportunity to learn about the other person in a casual and calm setting. Save escape rooms and day trips for further down the line!
5. Looks matter but not that much
You aren’t in your teens or early twenties, so relax. No one will judge you on your looks and neither should you be sceptical about your appearance. With age, you not only get mature and wise but also very charismatic. Wear your confidence, your personal style and be exactly who you are. You haven’t waited all this while to let someone judge you, accept or reject you on the basis on your looks. Let the wait be worth it.
6. Feel young
You have grown in age but that doesn’t mean you can’t feel young. One of the common mistakes older people do is to show that age brings boredom. Whether this is your first date or one of the many to find the right partner; be happy and cherish the moment. Be young, bold and let your heart pound. If you still have that teenager hidden inside, let it out and be youthful.
It’s obvious that dating when you’re younger is far easier than doing it now, but doesn’t mean you stop enjoying or stop trying. Don’t let your past decisions hamper your future or let your age shape your relationship.